Skip to main content

Jebakan

Esokku tak ketara
Jemariku menyisa cakaran-cakaran putus asa
Pada tembok sekelam jelaga

Kaku sekali nafasku
Seperti baru mendapat paru-paru
Kedipanku kalah cepat dengan kilauan lampu bioskop tua
Langkahku tak mampu menyalip nenek jompo tetangga kita

Krek krek
Kaki kuseret
Krek krek
Tumitku lecet
Krek krek
Kukuku patah
Krek krek
Aku berdarah

Luka luka luka
Siapa tahu itu dusta
Sakit sakit sakit
Rintihanmu terdengar pelit

Tik tik
Jam tidak berfungsi di dimensi ini
Hanya ada gelap dan terang
Pertanda malam dan siang
Tok tok
Pintu tidak terpasang di rumah ini
Hanya ada langit kosong
Penuh lorong gorong-gorong

Bukan rumah kita
Rumah Tuan-Tuan
Mereka datang melibas batas realitas
Mereka menjual mimpi
Tapi bukan impian
Mereka kotor
Seperti bajumu, rambutmu, hatimu
Semua yang ada padamu

-07

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

a chunk of glass

i've been wanting to paint your soul with the color of the world so that you can see the magic hiding behind everyone's eyes i've been wanting to whisper poems about stars and dreams to your abyss praying for you long last memories i've been wanting to stitch your limbs to help you learn how to dance and venture to fail your loneliness from tearing you apart maybe if i had listened to the beat of your core how transparent and colorless it was like a chunk of glass i see that's why sometimes it looks empty only when i finally tried to stare closely and squint my eyes only if i was not too scared to know what's inside it was unmolded not sure if it's too strong or too stubborn either way, it remained the same.

letter for blue

recently i have forgotten your birthday. i still remember your voice and the way you talk. i've made peace with my feelings. but sometimes you appeared in my dreams as both fantasy and nightmare. you're something i wish i could erase. yet here i am clinging onto the smallest thing like your smile that would never be intended to me. memories are deceitful, and i hope so. i hope it's my memories that betray me, that i am actually just a sick person and you're nothing but a halucination. so i could drink the medicine and be okay. perhaps it is not about you, perhaps you've unfortunately became a proof of something more tragic than pure. a door for the darkness that has existed in me since a long time ago. it is pathetic how i froze whenever i saw a glimpse of your fractions in a crowd or when a stranger has your name, eventhough i knew it was not the real you. i have always known that loneliness takes half of my being. as if i am not 'me' if i do not have them...

< animus >

Tonight, I’d be fine I could sleep In the midst of chaos I’d move backwards everytime my guilt decapitated my essence Tonight, I found somebody's reflection on a broken mirror And it was a boy He was made from my desperate prayers in every crowds Sometimes I saw him with his innocent smile Sparkling eyes and curly hair Clean uniforms and black loafers His voice was kind He looked alive, and perfect Unlike the world I was ragged I wish I were you I'd have been beautiful Tonight, I'd fight with my dirty nails and sharpened wooden stick You’d fight with soft words that kill minds I drank their blood You danced with their corpses But we both lost the war, despite our childhood secret dreams We knew we’d do Maybe I should hold your hand from the start Before I brought you your doom, and you brought mine But it’s fine Cause the longing is finally ending The longing is finally ending. ~•~ / Why I Only Face You Now When I've Known You Since F...